Wednesday, September 15, 2010

The One Where I Boycott Things

I'm all about making a statement. If I think something's unfair, I'll say, "Hey! That's not fair!"

Or if I think something's offensive, I'll be like, "Hey! That's offensive!"

Yesterday, D and I went to this Chinese place near here. We each got the lunch special, which was like $5. Then, thanks to hot mustard (mine) and General Tso's chicken (D's), we got thirsty. D went up to get a tea and maybe a Diet Coke, and the lady was all, "No debit card purchases under $5." And D's like, "I don't have cash, and we just spent a collective $10." And she's all, "No."

(I found out later that technically, stores aren't allowed to do that. They're supposed to take cards for any amount, and that if a store sets a minimum? That's not really allowed. Unfortunately, most credit card companies won't do anything about it, even if you complain.)

So D's pissed. Ultimately, he went to the Food Lion next door and bought two bottles of water, but I don't think we're going to be going back to that particular Chinese place.

That got me thinking about boycotting things. I have a few things I'm currently boycotting, and now I can add that place to the list. Following are my Things I'm Boycotting:

1) That Chinese Place

2) The Bruegger's Bagels in Wake Forest (This is because of terrible, terrible service, and the fact that it's full of rude, snotty people.)

3) Any movie containing Matthew McConaughey (Because OBVIOUSLY!)

4) The morning show "Bob and the Showgram" on one of the radio stations in town.

This one has more of a history. Bob is obnoxious. I can't stand him. His co-host, Mike, is obnoxious, and thinks he's awesome. He's not. They do stupid, stupid things on the show that insult my intelligence anyway. This one morning, they're talking about. . .something, I don't even remember, and the girl co-host, Kristin, was like, "Well, Bob, you think all women are prostitutes anyway." And Bob's all, "Yeah, that's true."

As soon as those words left his mouth, I flipped the station. I was really, really insulted by that, and I didn't even need to know his reason. D's like, "What was that for?" and I said, "I'm not listening to this show anymore. I'm boycotting it." And I have. I have not listened to the show since that day, which was probably in June or July.

I found out later that the reasoning behind that was that Bob feels women don't have sex ever except to gain something, whether immediately, or in the future. Coming from a man who, admittedly, has sex like once a month? Bob needs to SHUT HIS WHORE MOUTH. After finding out the explanation, I'm glad I stopped listening. It's such a popular show that it's not like one person not listening is going to make a difference, but it makes me feel better.

5) BP (I accidentally typed "BO." I guess I'm boycotting that, too.)

6) Family Guy

Now this one, I've never shared, but I'm doing it now. I was up visiting my cousin and her husband a few months back, and her husband (Frank) and I were watching Family Guy. Carrie'd already gone to bed.

In this particular episode, Stewie (the baby) fell down the stairs and was comatose from what was obviously a Traumatic Brain Injury. The entire episode, it was this joke that Brian (the dog) was trying to keep everyone from finding out what had happened. Through it all, the baby is not moving, not responding, etc.

At the end, the mother is backing out of the driveway, and the father, who has since realized the baby is brain-damaged, throws the baby under the car so it looks like the mother has damaged her baby by running over him. Then she's all, "Oh! We can cover this up!"

Some of you might remember my cousin, John, who was in a car accident last Christmas and who himself received a TBI. Unlike the cartoon character, John isn't going to be OK by the next episode. There is nothing at all funny about a kid with a brain injury.

So that's why I'm boycotting Family Guy. Because every time I am around John for extended periods of time, I'm weepy for a week afterwards. Because it's just not fair. At all.

I still have the FG DVDs I bought, but I need to get rid of them, I think. I've been watching what I recognize to be older episodes when I see them on TV, but I feel like that's a cop-out boycott. If I'm going to say I don't appreciate something, I should probably not appreciate it in its entirety.

So. . .if anyone needs the first two box sets of Family Guy DVDs. . .

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